“Why is America the greatest country in the world?”
“It’s not the greatest country in the world, professor, that’s my answer.”
“You’re saying-
“Yes.”
“Let’s talk about-“
Fine. Sharon, the NEA is a loser. Yeah, it accounts for a penny out of our paycheck but he gets to hit you with it at any time he wants. It doesn’t cost money, it costs votes- it costs air time and column inches. You know why people don’t like liberals? ‘Cause they lose. If liberals are so fuckin’ smart then how come they lose so god damn always?
And with a straight face, you’re going to tell students that America is so star-spangled awesome that we’re the only ones in the world who have freedom?
CANADA has freedom. JAPAN has freedom. The UK, France, Germany, Italy, Spain, Australia, BELGIUM has freedom. 207 sovereign states in the world, like 180 of them have freedom.
“Alright-“
“Oh yeah, and yeah you sorority girl. Just in case you accidentally wander into a voting booth one day there’s some things you should know, and one of them is: there is absolutely no evidence to support that statement that we’re the greatest country in the world.
We’re 7th in literacy.
27th in math.
22nd in science.
49th in life expectancy, 178th in infant mortality, 3rd in median household income, number 4 in labor force, and number 4 in exports.
We lead the world in only 3 categories: number of in incarcerated citizens per ca-pita, number of adults who believe angels are real, and defense spending where we spending more than the next 26 countries combined- 25 of whom are allies.
Now none of this is the fault of a 20 year old college student, but you nonetheless are without a doubt are a member of the worst. generation. ever. So when you ask what makes us the greatest country in the world, I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.
It sure used to be.
We stood up for what was right.
We fought for moral reasons.
We passed laws, struck down laws for moral reasons.
We waged wars on poverty, not poor people.
We sacrificed, we cared about our neighbors. We put our money where our mouths were and we never beat our chest. We built great big things, made un-godly technological advances, explored the universe, cured diseases, and we cultivated the worlds greatest artists and the worlds greatest economy.
We reached for the stars. Acted like men. We aspired for intelligence, we didn’t belittle it. It didn’t make us feel inferior.
We didn’t identify ourselves by who we voted for in the last election and we didn’t- we didn’t scare so easy.
We were able to be all these things and do all these things because we were informed.
By great men.
Men who were revered.
The first step in solving any problem is recognizing there is one.
America is not the greatest country in the world anymore.
